Born and raised in Colorado Springs, CO to a family that makes the show "Shameless" seem mild, I could not escape that city fast enough. I filled every free moment with academics, volunteerism, sports, and reading as a reprieve from the chaos. There was never an idle moment, for that left me facing the reality of my life.
It took me years to finally admit that the mountains were not enough for me to stay in a place that never felt safe to me.
I found my voice through spoken word poetry. For the first time, I felt that my words and the story they told had meaning. I attended open mics as often as I could, competed in slams, and even went to Brave New Voices in San Francisco.
After finishing my Bachelor's in psychology in May of 2022, my husband and I packed up our entire life and moved to Florida. We sold our furniture and I even parted ways with about 200 books in my collection. My husband, myself, our 4-year-old daughter, and our three cats hopped in our cars and set off to chase the sun toward our new beginning.
1,700 miles and a fresh start later, I found a good therapist, we started frequenting the beach, and for the first time, I started to heal. There were no skeletons in closets here, and I learned what it felt like to breathe. My marriage improved. My friendships deepened. For the first time in a long time, I felt hopeful.
Until recently, most of my professional career consisted of social work in the child welfare system and providing Applied Behavior Analysis therapy for kids with autism. I still have so much passion for both populations, but I could not handle the work environments.
After the death of my estranged father, my worldview collapsed. I found myself wondering how I found myself working too many hours to visit the beach. For the first time in a very long time, I began to ask myself what kind of work I wanted to do for myself rather than what I wanted to do for the world.
Ultimately, I found myself here: sharing stories with others who have too much within them to keep inside. I am finally pursuing my dreams, allowing myself to rest, and piecing together my memoir little by little.
